Tom Shady

Being a recent transplant to Boston, I don't pretend to have any 

sort of deep alliances to sports teams.  I have always liked the Celtics, so now I have an excuse to cheer for them, and I love the New England Revolution, even though the rest of the nation seems to have forgotten that the MLS even exists, but the buck stops there.  I am almost entirely indifferent to the Red Sox, or to be more specific, to the sport of baseball in general.  Interesting, then, that this recent incident would bother me so much.

The incident being Tom Brady, the pretty-boy supermodel-whipped "quarterback" of the New England Patriots, wearing a San Francisco Giants hat at game 7 of the Celtics-Cavs playoffs.  Like I said, my home-town sports pride is only 9 months deep, but Brady's blatant disrespect for one of the most revered aspects of the city of Boston just upped his douche-factor about 100%.  I get it; you were born in San Francisco.  I was born in San Diego, and I have much more of an alliance to the Padres than to the Sox, but I'm not going to sit courtside at a Boston Celtics game and wear a Padres hat.  It's Boston for Christ's sake.

Congratulations, Tom.  Not only did you lose what was meant to be a sure-thing win at the Superbowl this year, but you have now elevated your douchebag status to the level of that one football player who was on The Bachelor.  

Also, nice Stetson ad.  Nothing says "manly" like shearling.

I'm so ahead of the curve.

Jezebel also finds the current trends at Urban Outfitters to be disgusting.  Hey.  You guys want to give me a job?  Yeah, thanks.

Plagiarism!!

Having doubts about carpet?

I think every person that has some level of quick wit or sarcasm at least once in their lives will be told, "You should really go into advertising."   My parents have told me that on numerous occasions, usually after I have just recounted a particularly funny story or postulated on how to improve the Bud Light team's marketing tactics ("This would really be more effective if they used green jell-o").  How that qualifies me for advertising, I'm not quite sure.  Every time it is mentioned, I flash back to the famous scene in The Graduate  concerning the word "plastics." But today, while procrastinating and watching Oprah interviewing the cast of Sex and the City (sidenote: I would do anything to never hear that Fergie song again) I thought, "Yes, maybe I should go into advertising."

Why the sudden change of heart?  It was a carpet commercial for National Floors direct in which a woman, without any explanation or background information (it was, in fact, before the ad even stated which company it was advertising) proclaimed, "I'm a skeptic, but I needed some carpeting."  Apparently, skeptics don't like carpeting?  Carpeting causes gullibility? Did you know the word "carpet" isn't in the dictionary?

Now, I'm all for the occasional low-budget commercial (can I get a Head-On?) but really, this just comes down to not making sense at all.  Whether the nice 50-something lady in the red turtleneck is a skeptic really has no bearing on whether or not she needed carpeting.  Maybe her feet were cold; maybe she spilled some red wine; maybe that pagan animal slaughter ritual got a little out of hand the other night; the point is, ma'am (I am addressing you directly now, pagan turtleneck lady), it's OK to be a skeptic and install new carpeting.  It is not OK to allow this kind of idiotic advertising to continue.